I’m beginning to hate kids. I remember myself as affectionate towards little kids as I love watching them playing. Mom used to say how easily kids get together with me… my little cousins whom I see once in a year or so. Two doors right from my door, there’s a family living with two little girl children. I assume the eldest is 3-4 and youngest could be around 2. The entire corridor is theirs. Initially I used to smile at them whenever I had to cross them in the corridor. A couple of months later the real attack started. Early morning, the family opens their doors and let the kids go on a rampage. Everything in front of every single flat in the corridor will be devastated or misplaced in a few minutes… Shoe racks, waste baskets, newspaper boxes… all mercilessly scattered on the whole floor. The whole corridor will start sounding like they have a schedule of Rambo V going on. One morning, I made tea and was waiting for the carnage to go down a bit so that I could open the door a little to squeeze the newspaper inside. I was too late and all I got was a bunch of shredded paper which looked like it had been used by Jet Li as a weapon against a group of Kung Fu masters!
Since I am being known as an epitome of peace and kindness in this part of the world, I calmed my mind down with excuses of them being little cute children and all… then something else started happening. The kids started banging every door in the mornings. The latch will be banged up and down on the wooden door of every single flat in this corridor. My door has an iron frame in front. The kids could not touch the latch easily so I was saved. Or so I thought. Next morning I woke up to the noise of mad shaking of the iron door accompanied with screaming and frenzied shouting. I ran to the door and opened it to see a young woman (probably the kid’s mother!) standing with a plate of baby food. I looked at her questioningly and she replied ‘Little Girl!’ as if that excuse is supposed to solve any kind of ill feeling I had with the whole episode. The kid had turned to another door and started banging the latch on it. The mother smiled at me (probably her seductive best!) and walked over to put a spoonful of baby food into the kid’s mouth. With renewed energy the kid turned to a shoe rack and toppled it to the floor. A minute later, a waste basket was opened and contents were spread on the floor. I understood that nothing will change if I complain to the mother who is an accomplice in everything the kid was doing. I waited for an opportunity to have a word with the kids’ father. I have seen him in the lift and the parking lot and all before and he seemed to be working in some distant corner of the city. He leaves early and comes back late… must be a hardworking man who’d probably understand the importance of some peace of mind at the end of the day!
Sunday came. I woke up to an Olympics going on in the corridor. I had the courage to open the door in time to save my newspaper (I wouldn’t miss a Sunday Newspaper with all the special editions and supplements!) and witnessed the father organizing a running match between the kids. They were running around, screaming and shouting! The fathers’ voice must have been shaking the entire building out of its foundation. I felt like my head was spinning… The Olympics went on for an hour or so before the kids got tired. I shelved my idea of expecting any kind of civilized response from the kids’ father! I still get attacked occasionally. I suspect mine is the only house the kids never got a chance to enter… which is a bad thing because they seem to be extremely curious about what is inside. If I come out from outside and the kids are in the corridor, I have to open two doors in a record time of 17 seconds or they’ll be pushing me through the door. I’d hate myself if I ever behave rude to kids… that sort of thing could leave a permanent mark in them and I’d hate to be someone who did that. The parents seem to be unapologetic to every carnage these kids do and I suspect that all the three flat-occupants in the same floor must be having their anger welled up inside.
These days I call them ‘drones’. I use codes like ‘Drones are being launched’ when I have time to construct a full sentence or ‘Drones in the Air’ for a shorter one! Unlike the military drones, these are pretty unpredictable. There is not always a fixed target as they do the surveillance first and then decide to pick a random target and devastate it with full force. I instructed the newspaper boy to keep the newspaper through a hole in the iron grill way above the girls can reach. I stopped keeping the garbage outside for the cleaners to pick up. I wait for the cleaners to show up and then personally deliver the garbage bag to them whenever is possible. When corridors start resembling the sets of The Expendables or Die Hard, I retire to an inside room with a book!
I think if these things continue like this for a couple of more months no one can stop me from becoming somebody like Hannibal Lectorand I have the kids’ father targeted!
Hannibal Lecter (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Body bags…. Body bags…. Body bags….
P.S :- As much as I love kids, I love my privacy! I still believe in peaceful Sundays and silent winter evenings were I can sit in the balcony with a nice book or a good playlist undisturbed by anything… I tend to hate things that disturb these peace sessions. Over the time, I think I have grown a bit paranoid about my privacy that I switch off my cell phone before I sit to watch a film/documentary or change the mode to ‘offline’ before I go for a walk listening to music.
- Manu
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Those parents need some serious discipline…followed by the kids. Maybe that’s what we have now, Drone Generation? I know it’s not uncommon.
As for privacy, paranoia and the switching off of phones. I salute you! Peace of mind is hard to come by…treasure the moment when you can
Cuteee! I like the way you describe the drones
Thanks Jensy!
The drones aren’t very cute, though! I thought of them as cute and I should say that appearances can be deceiving!
ha ha ha oh poor you..he he
i used to hatekids before i had one..actually a little before that.
oh man i used to think why would someone go get married and have kids and ruin their prefect solitude..oh how things change when you have one..but ya you are parent with one with two or more you are a refree always in the ring and no breaks
I’m beginning to see your point, Soma.
he he he!
But my only problem is becoming a spectator and a victim to the rampage done by somebody’s players!
You’re not alone in this issue. Parents these day don’t control their kids and be it anything the kid does they gawk with pride and admiration. Back when we were kids, if we pull off something similar my mum would make sure I don’t toe the line next time.
It reminds of an incident when I visited my friend’s house. My friend’s little brother must be around just 6 years old and he started calling us with names. We were frankly taken aback but his mother was going all ‘oooh’ and ‘aww’.. We couldn’t help but smile, suppressing our annoyance.
True. I remember one of my cousins using a cuss word which shocked me because it came from the mouth of a mere 7 year old. If I use the same word in the presence of my father even now, he wouldn’t hesitate to thrash me. I had a similar experience like the one you have mentioned above.
What to do?
…..and I thought my son was already annoying.
I am always worried that he’d annoy people whenever he tries to talk to them. But the opposite always happens. He actually makes friends with those he bothers.
Sometimes we parents tend to get lost in our own little world.
Even if you saw the mom or the dad seem to tolerate their kids’ mischiefs, they may be honestly unaware that it’s bothering other people. A civilized conversation with these kids’ parents is still worth a try. 
Thanks Grace,
for the comment and a way out of it. I’d definitely try and talk to the parents next time the drones are launched at me. I was a bit taken aback by their approach and was annoyed at the fact that they never thought their kids were bothering others even though a nice playing space and a garden is at the disposal of the residents of this community.